Female Conversations That Men Need to Stay Away From

I’ve seen it happen time and time again. A young man’s life turned upside-down inside-out in a matter of seconds. One minute, everything is cool. You’re laughing and joking having a good time. The next minute you’re left with the “I thought everything was cool” face, while you scratch your head and mumble cuss words under your breath. Pay attention, as I give you a few examples of Female Conversations That Men Need to Stay Away From.

Before we get to it let’s cover our bases. First and foremost, their is a fine art to conversation; and in order to have successful conversation, participants must achieve a workable balance of contributions in which all parties have mutually connected with the speaker or things that the speaker knows.

Using that logic I could really stop writing here citing men and women don’t have successful conversation– The End. But for the sake of this article and the few lost brothas we still have out there, I will push forward. Any man who has ever talked to a woman knows that 60-70 percent of the time you simply don’t know what the hell they’re talking about. You just nod, mix in a few laughs, and eventually change the subject to what you want to talk about. I know that sounds harsh but the reality is most women don’t really care what you have to say either, they just want you to listen.

But for the few men out there who do listen to everything, and somehow want to engage these ladies in their convos let me impart these words of wisdom: Somethings are better left unsaid. The reality is when guys talk too much they generally end up putting their foot in their mouths and somehow, some way end up apologizing.

Women and men are different creatures and like to talk about different things– and that’s ok. I found that the problem lies when those try to cross the lines of what’s known, and venture into a place where they have no damn business. Most men don’t even realize that talking with a woman, or even worse a group of women is like tightrope walking with Timberlands on. One false move and that’s yo ass.

Weight
If you’re in a relationship and your girl ever asks you ANY questions about her weight and you plan on still being with her (emphasis on still),the answer is simply: Baby you’re beautiful, stop trippin! No need to mention that she still looks good in spite of the weight, that is saying too much–just don’t acknowledge it. The fact the she has asked you the question means it’s on her mind.

The truth is highly overrated in these types of situations. Trust me, she is already fully aware of the fact that she has gained a few pounds, she just wants to see how your monkey@ss feels about it. She planted the bait out there and just wants to see if you’re going to bite it. Actions speak louder than words and the reality of this kind of thing is her weight problem has become your weight problem you’re just going to have to bite the bullet and work-out with her (even if you haven’t gained any weight) or shut up.

In non-romantic relationships the same rules apply minus the working out with them part. Keep your mouth shut, and keep it moving.

Marriage
This should be self-explanatory. Women are primed and ready for these types of convos. Strapped with all types of opinions and experiences (although most of them have NEVER been married). She can tell you why you’re not ready for marriage, your commitment issues, and reasons why you should get married all in the same sentence. Women are infatuated with the idea of marriage. It is a major talking point in their lives. Especially stay away from taking part in this conversation with a group of women.

If you’re a man in a relationship and you’re not ready to be married, don’t allow yourself to be baited into these conversations. Women will claim you’re afraid of commitment if you stay away from it, but just because you don’t want to talk about it doesn’t mean your afraid of commitment, it just means you’re not thinking about getting married. Men don’t talk about things they don’t think about. Case and point, when is the last time you had a conversation about ballet? or Elton John? Since women dominate marriage conversations, it’s your job to know when and when not to speak on it. You must be extremely judicious not to give to much. Equally important is understanding the mindset of the woman you’re dealing with. Some women can be objective and have a conversation without making the conversation personal, other women—- not so much. The real reason why you want to stay away from this conversation is because when you start it you have to end it– and if you’re not ready to end it, don’t start it. Smile and keep it moving.

Hair
After seeing Good Hair my life changed. I realized that this hair conversation is extremely layered and goes into places where I am totally ignorant. Seeing that most women equate so much of their beauty to their hair, this is a topic that no man can really identify with. First, I would recommend men do research and just be a fly on the wall with many of the hair conversations that women have. Once this is done, take notice of what race of women are having the conversation, because the reality is the conversation is A LOT more sensitive in different races. If you’re ever asked what you think of a particular style and that is not your woman, your answer is: I like it. If you’ re asked by your own lady your reply is : I love it. You can step in a whole pile of shit by answering those questions any differently.

I personally have witnessed men get crucified for simply saying “I don’t like it” or “I don’t know about that one”. I’m totally aware of the double standard that exists here, because if you come from the barbershop looking like you got edged-up with a butter-knife, ladies are going to go in. But it’s not that simple for you sir. You have too much to lose and not enough to gain. Again fellas, your real opinion doesn’t matter. I don’t care if she comes in the house rockin a bald head with jheri-curl sideburns, if that’s your lady and you want to keep it that way– your answer is: I love it.

Don’t say we never told you.

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6 Responses to Female Conversations That Men Need to Stay Away From

  1. Pingback: Tweets that mention Female Conversations That Men Need to Stay Away From | The Smugger -- Topsy.com

  2. Jeff Toliver says:

    LOl @ edged-up with a butter-knife

  3. Jeff Toliver says:

    I do have a question tho. I agree with you 100% on the weight subject. Especially the “bite the bullet and work-out with her” part. But sometimes there is absolutely nothing a man can do..lol He might say something like “Baby you look great and you are beautiful but if you really feel like you want to work out i will happily go with you and we can work out together.” I mean, this is what a man should do, encourage his lady while supporting her and the things she wants to do all at the same time right? Turth in the matter is most women dont really want their man to even see them sweat..lol Most likely she will say “Ill, I dont want you to see me struggle” or something along those lines so nothing really changes. And trust, the question of if she had gained weight will come up again, and again, and again. So my advice to you ladies is PLEASE, dont crucify your man…lol he loves you for you not because you were 10 pounds less last year..lol and my advice to the fellas is “LISTEN TO AUSTIN ANYWAY CAUSE ILL GET YOU IN TROUBLE”…LMAO

  4. Felicia A. Williams says:

    Loved the article! With respect to conversations about “marriage”. I had one the other day with one of my homeboys. I told him he needed to find a wife and settle down. His response, which I loved and shut me up was “I could see myself getting married one day.” Perfect! Short and simple and non-offensive. I left it alone. Secondly, the “weight” issue. I also had a conversation with another homeboy about black men and what they thought about our “weight”. He said that most black men love their women thick. I responded with “since I have a slender frame, I’m not supposed to be thick! He came back perfectly, “but you have curves”. I love my buddies for their perfect responses in not allowing themselves to get tripped up.

  5. vic says:

    I like taking chances so I may just tell the truth…LMAO!

  6. Sheri says:

    I love this, very insightful. 😉

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